It’s the final fling: the last couple days of school where truths are told, crushes revealed, graduation roses given, and a whole lot of emotion exchanged. Before I can leave this truly Holy Hill, though, I must speak my own truth. We—Olivia Tucker and I, the Editorials editors—have been lying to you, the readers, this whole time. The entire year.
The thing with a lie is that it’s so easy to grow. The first time we did it, we thought we were slick; we were being sneaky. We didn’t stop, though. For almost every issue this great, tradition-steeped Chronicle has published this year, we have tapped the most thought-provoking upperclassmen for their incredible wisdom, publishing their college essays under the guise of mere Editorials pieces. This is our truth, and we’re sorry.
To put this crime against Episcopal’s literary subculture in perspective, though, the simple fact is that college essays are so much more interesting to read. Both Olivia and I are students here, too, and we know that reading about someone’s opinion on the trial class schedule, the new desserts in the dining hall, or HQ Trivia are simply not intellectually enriching. So, like anyone looking for great writers, we looked to the Ivies: John Woodward and Joy Ashford, to name a couple. These two seniors are academic powerhouses, and their Common App essays were nothing short of amazing. For the Chronicle’s January issue, we milked a college essay for William and Mary from UPenn bound John Woodward. You might remember reading John eloquently give advice to underclassmen when talking about his beat-up, blue Volkswagen Beetle, but in reality, you were essentially reading his admissions statement. For Joy, who’s only a few short months away from Harvard, we knew her college essay was too good to pass up. “Boogie Fever, Dancin’ Feet” was the bomb, and obviously Harvard recognized that, too.
It feels great to get this deep-seated, community-crumbling lie off our chests, because what would the last week of school be without a little truth, right? The funny thing, though, is that we did it again. Right above this very article you are reading right now, you will see Olivia’s polished essay about her love for poetry. No, we didn’t contract Olivia to write about poetry because we think it’s super fascinating, we included the draft of her college essay because it’s so gosh darn well-written. I don’t blame you if you walk away from this year with an empty pit in your stomach knowing that you’ve been lied to, but, as a last hoorah, we thought we’d come clean.
So there you have it, Olivia and I are filthy liars. But hey, we sure did bring some Daemon-rivaling content to the table, right?